If there’s one sure-fire thing to make me upset these days, it is the impending doom that is buying a ticket back to Utah for a visit. I don’t mean that I don’t want to come. Instead, I just don’t want to come to terms with what will likely become a common occurrence – traveling LONG distances alone.
I’m coming back to the States weeks before Stark does. Since being together, neither of us have traveled internationally without the other although we’ve both been here or there within short trips without our SO. I know I can do it. Although I have been spoiled by Stark to the point that I have completely forgotten how to travel by myself – identification what? – long trips have become sort of a heart-warming reminder that we are always together in this world. Us against the world! It goes as far back as our first trips together – stateside and to South Africa. Both were a symbolic sort of rightofpassage. For the first, it was in the initial stages of our relationship when I wasn’t entirely sure if we were together or going to stay together. All I knew was I liked this guy and I was terrified that after my recovery, he would admit, “Oh, we’re just friends…” and send me back home to a life of trying to remind my dog who I was after so many months away. Taking me on a work trip was one of those, “Oh he for sure likes me… I think? No, for sure! I think…” moments. Because I was still all busted up and sporting crutches, he treated me to a First Class flight – the only First Class flight we’ve booked in the States together. It meant a lot to me.
Likewise, our trip to South Africa was a whole new right of passage level. I was being invited on a nogirlfriendsallowed trip that I wasn’t even invited on until a few weeks before. I was introduced to long time traditions that Stark and his friends have when embarking on an International trip. Traditions that Stark and I have upheld.
So how am I supposed to cheers a flight without my partner? Who am I supposed to lean over the partition with to ensure we’re watching the same movie at the same exact time? How am I supposed to be able to have a bite of everything the International flight has to offer if I don’t have someone to switch meals with mid flight? How am I supposed to stow away with multiple complimentary travel packs without having anyone to steal from?
I’m leaving weeks earlier so I can be in attendance at my very best, long time friend’s wedding as his right hand man, but only… a woman. That’s right. I’m the best man. As if that wouldn’t already raise enough questions for anyone who doesn’t know me or our relationship, now I will be attending a wedding without my date. I’ll be all dressed up with no one to impress. Well, that’s if I’m lucky. I’m not quite sure how I am going to get all dressed up in my allotted dress without anyone there to zip me up. First world problems… I know. It is just one of those things I look forward to for months ahead of time. Everything is right with the world at 36,000 feet. At least, it was.