I used to be one of those people that flew from Utah to New York and felt as though I had to prepare myself for the “jet lag” of two hours time difference. I mean, as a college student, waking up for an 8am class was bad enough, but then taking a hiatus for Sony Music College Rep meetings in New York, New York and having to rock up (literally, not Aussie-like) Madison Avenue for an 8am meeting, bagel in hand certainly felt like 6am. And that’s the truth. It did feel like 6am. In my mind it was 6am. But, what’s wrong with 6am? Honestly. The sun is still out. It is still a reasonably human hour. The hardest part about prepping for visits to Sony’s Manhattan office certainly wasn’t the two hour time difference, and was more so the 8am to 2am days that consisted of meetings, jam sessions, Legacy movie reels, more meetings, more jam sessions, venue-hopping, and then some kind of networking event. And yes, networking at 2am. It’s the music business. Everyone’s doing it.
Now, I’m old. And, I wish it were as simple as that. If you haven’t guessed already, it’s not. Nope. It’s not that simple at all.
jet lag n. extreme tiredness and other physical effects felt by a person after a long flight across different time zones.
“Ok Google…” Are you listening? Can I ask just one thing of your definition there? How the H-E-double hockey sticks am I supposed to know when the jet lag stops and the narcolepsy begins?
narcolepsy n. a condition characterized by an extreme tendency to fall asleep
“Ok Google…” No. Shit.
Flying West is about the easiest thing you can do to adjusting to regular day time activities. It’s the equivalent of staying up late rather than, say, trying to get to bed at what feels like two in the afternoon for you. Yet, no matter of sunshine, bright lights, playlists, vitamins, coffee, or caffeinated fruit punch concoctions seem to get me entirely through a day without going entirely brain dead by noon or so.
Stark doesn’t share this exact sentiment about jet lag, but I can tell he’s at least a little tired too. So, imagine what us abnormal people feel.
I really did it to myself this time, however. As though adjusting time zones back and forth wasn’t hard enough as it is, we came back to 113*F (that’s pass-out levels of heat – just one more thing to make me not know exactly what it is I am feeling right now). But, that was just the cake. There’s icing, cherries, sprinkles, and more.
On top of the extreme weather, we both immediately went on post-Christmas post-vacation diets and immediate pedal to the metal levels of gym attendance. Every day. One or two hours a day. Go! Go! Go! Go! And we’ve rid ourselves of an extra 1,500 calories we’d gotten used to between Christmas and Sundance. Now, I’m a mostly vegetarian, high activity, high intensity, jet laggy, hot (literally) mess! Not to mention that all this new wave sense of activity hit at the exact time as my own personal monthly invasion of energy. Ya… you get it. The little red devil herself. Now, I’m literally passing out with the combination of all of the above, and I honestly can’t differentiate issues or feelings so the bottom line is — I just don’t know when to stop.
I’ve been home one damn week. Just one! And my body wants to kill me. It wants to curl up under ice cold sheets, eat cake for dinner, and lose weight the ‘easy’ way. Ya know, by withering away into nothingness and forgetting my own existence or need for food. But, I don’t have that luxury anymore. I’m creeping through my 30’s. The lean, mean lazy machine that worked for me in my college years does nothing but turn into “such a [skinny] fat” now. I’m not into skinny fat. Nope. And every year I get older, the strength it takes to build and sustain muscle feels like death! You gotta do what you gotta do.
Just incase the physicality of it all wasn’t enough, I also have to note the incredible mental and emotional strength, long hours, and crippling anxiety (at times) it has been for me as I’ve taken the last eight months to decide and three months to prepare the logical, needed move to owning and running my own business.
Now, I’ve run my own business before. I’ve done it for years. In fact, I’ve been an entrepreneur most of my life. I was born with it. But I was born with the innate sense of self-reliance so much so that in all my business ventures, I’ve never actually grown to having full or even part time assistance. I’ve always gone my own way, putting in the hundreds of hours it takes in this world to make a buck, and trusting absolutely no one to do it for me.
Nothing has pushed my comfort zone boundaries more than this adjustment has in quite some time. And, that’s a good thing!
Many times, I’ve threatened to throw the towel in and go about it the easy way or quit all together. But, I’ve learned that all-or-nothing mentality has actually fueled my ability to be good at business. And, I’ve near completed my journey. Proposals proposed. Contracts out. Team assigned. Bank accounts opened. Business name established. And I already have a core team of five people, with additional writers, translators, videographers, and more as needed. All that’s left is a few signatures, a couple more pieces of paperwork to adjust from one entity to another, and then I am free to become comfortable with a new schedule and a new set of goals. I. can’t. wait. I hate limbos.
In the end, I certainly “jet lagged” wrong. In truth, there’s just no way of preparing for the adjustments that have been on the rise. I’ve done my best, and I’ve done a hell of a job. Mostly and mainly, I absolutely hands down no way Jose could have done it without my Stark who legafied and gentrified every step of the way for me. He has sat quietly when I have lost my mind momentarily. And he’s put his foot down when I’ve tried to get out of it. I couldn’t ask for a better Valentine. Besides, he truly deserves a little Sugar Momma status because that man gives everyone around him a life of constant celebration. And I can’t wait to celebrate with him. That is, after these six inches are lost and the first official paycheck is framed.
I’m in business baby! And it’s going to get a hell of a lot more tired from here. But at least I know I have a team I can rely on and any time I need the kind of break that comes with tiny umbrellas or excessive amounts of snow, I get to disconnect for a little while. Guilt free!